Transcript

Caitlin Gardner: [00:00:00] So motherhood prepared me uniquely during COVID to introduce calm confidence to my life, to, you know, struggling and smoothing things out. And that has definitely benefited me professionally as well. 'cause that's the calm maturity that I can bring to a chaotic situation. If a client is dealing with a high stakes communications moment.

Jess Ekstrom: Welcome back to Amplify with Jess tro, where we amplify your ideas, your influence, and your income. Today our guest is Caitlin Gardner, who I actually met when I was speaking, and she is the master of what she calls calm confidence. I definitely need the calm part. This is the art of maintaining clarity and composure when let's just.

Stuff hits a fan and the stakes are high. Caitlin is the founder of a strategic communications firm and has spent her career helping top companies navigate chaos, especially during moments of unexpected [00:01:00] crisis. Caitlin is also now our Mic Drop Club host for Tampa. So if you wanna improve your public speaking skills, head to mic drop workshop.com/club and pick a city near you or join us virtually.

In this episode we'll talk about the power of preparation, how to build your reputation bank account. I've been thinking about that ever since, so people can give you the benefit of the doubt and the professional insights she's gained from staying calm dur during a truly chaotic delivery. Whether you're facing a crisis, dealing with unexpected feedback or just trying to manage a calm day, Caitlin is here to give you the tools to pause, think, and communicate with calm confidence.

So let's start at the beginning. In a Florida hospital where every newborn was heralded by the Dumbo song, and chaos was the new normal. 

Caitlin Gardner: My daughter was born in April, 2020. The world was shut down and we were unsure of what to expect, uh, in the delivery room. We also had a 3-year-old at home. So [00:02:00] managing a preschooler at home was, was a lot.

My husband had just lost his job and for the first time in our life I became the breadwinner and I was running crisis communications just like so many of my peers in the cruise industry. So you may remember that the cruise industry was one of the hardest hits at the initial signs of the pandemic. And.

We, I was juggling a lot. And then we had to deliver our daughter in a very chaotic world. So motherhood prepared me uniquely during COVID to introduce calm confidence to my life, to, you know, struggling and smoothing things out. And that has definitely benefited me professionally as well. 'cause that's the calm maturity that I can bring to a chaotic situation.

If a client is dealing with a high stakes communications moment, 

Jess Ekstrom: what in the delivery room like? Mm-hmm. Did. Was there any, like, was it mantras? Like what was the, how did you, what were some techniques that you pulled 

Caitlin Gardner: to stay calm? [00:03:00] Yeah, so this was my second child and I did know that I wanted the right support team around me.

I put so much pressure on myself because my first child, I, I think looking back, I had postpartum depression with him and I was really struggling to find my own. And with my daughter, I did have a doula and I, it's. Switch doctors to a midwife because I was very committed to having AV back after, um mm-hmm.

My, my first pregnancy. And I really wanted the right team that would support me. So when the hospital shut down and my mom wasn't able to be there, and all of the things that I envisioned, my expectations had to shift. So I had a great plan, I had a vision for what I wanted and it didn't happen. But at the end of the day, I wanted a healthy baby.

And that's really. What we were able to focus on. So mantras helped, um, the right support team, a lot of positivity. I literally had my cousin design beautiful mantras that we posted around the room. That was really helpful and just really focusing on [00:04:00] keeping myself calm during that moment and just saying, you know, how do I focus on, it's not about me right now, it's about the child and the baby.

And she ended up in NICU for a few days and we, my midwife admitted me a few more days as well. Stay with her because there was so much chaos of the lockdown and my husband couldn't leave and come back. We were very like, I think we were there for five or six days, kind of locked into the hospital and it was so.

Eerie and weird because they had in the state, we were in Florida and every few hours the on the music would play and there would be the Dumbo song of a Stork flying in, and that was every time a baby was born. And then they had the rocky song playing every time a COVID patient was released. It was such a bizarre time.

So to be stimulated by all of that, 

Jess Ekstrom: it feels like an episode of Black Mirror or something that's like, it's so crazy outta this world. I would be. Livid. If I was like in labor hearing those, it was bizarre. Do this to me. So I mean, you've been [00:05:00] able to transfer, like this is just one moment in your life.

Mm-hmm. But you speak about high stakes communication. Mm-hmm. You're the founder of communications. You have had a very extensive career from some top notable companies, helping them communicate better in the chaos. What are some like. Professional ways that we can start applying this calm confidence when things are unexpected at work.

Like I know for me, I was just talking to some of my friends the other day about going viral and how of course you want to go viral and be exposed to all these new people. And then I also have a fear of going viral because whenever I do it is just like all consuming. Hmm. Communication with people who don't know you.

Oh, she said this. She should have said that. And, uh, oh, she's wearing this and dah, dah, dah. And I'm like, oh my gosh. This is like taking all of my energy. [00:06:00] And luckily I've gone viral for. Good reasons, but I imagine you've also worked with people who have gone viral for bad reasons. Yeah. Um, what are just some like foundational things, like something unexpected happens, there's a crisis, like what's, what's next?

What's like the Gardner tool belt? 

Caitlin Gardner: So I think a few things is you always need to know, like, what is your voice? How are you showing up? How are you authentically? If this is a brand or a person, how are you showing up authentically? And that could mean, here are the values, here are the things that we've already defined.

And when you put things into your reputation bank account, I like to say you're kind of, you know, building up your reputation. And that's, are you reliable, are you trustworthy? And, and all of these things. And those. Are deposits that you make throughout your life and your career. Um, I was just speaking with some division one athletes and talking about how their reputation will carry with them.

Their jersey may change and they may end up at a different athletic environment and even professionally beyond their collegiates career. [00:07:00] But how are they going to make sure that, that, no matter what their team Jersey says, that they're always showing up 'cause their reputation carries with them. So when it comes to company and personal branding, you wanna make sure that you're.

Constantly putting positive deposits into your reputation bank account, so that way when you need to make a withdrawal, and in this case maybe something went viral and you didn't expect it, or it wasn't true to who you wanted to, how you intended to show up, how do people give you the benefit of the doubt?

Mm. Also, I think, you know, assuming good intent is something a wise person always shared with me, always assume good intent for the person across the board, across the email. You know? Now if there's somebody you know negatively. Trolling you, that's different. But when we're having professional conversations, always assume good intent for the person on the other side of that inbox.

Um, I think sometimes things can get lost in translation, so I also wanna make sure that people do try to think about like, hold on. What was the intent here? Do they mean some good feedback? Are they trying to tell me something? How do I read between the lines [00:08:00] here? And then I think calm confidence also comes with being prepared.

So a admitting that, yeah, you might have something where you fumble publicly. How do you address that? How do you wanna show up? Mm-hmm. And kind of going through that. So we call that in the corporate world, like a tabletop exercise where you're like, okay, here's the scenario. This whole thing happened.

Maybe it was a cyber attack or something like that. And we go through. All right. What is the Cee o saying or how are we responding to that? How is the customer service being responded to? What is happening with our phone system if it goes down, if our point of sale or, or e-commerce site crashes? How are we handling that with customers who are expecting us to have a really successful Black Friday experience?

So being prepared for the possible scenarios and not bearing our, our head in the sand, but being like, yeah, that could happen. And I'm not trying to be negative here, but if that does, how are we showing up with clarity and calm confidence? Because the stakes are always high. 

Jess Ekstrom: We talk about that in mic drop, like, you know, of course you want [00:09:00] the best case scenario to happen when you're on stage.

You want the standing ovation, you want, you know, everyone to be laughing and crying. But like I've tripped going up on stage, I've like slipped and said a word, maybe I shouldn't have. I, you know, I've had a dog. Barking. I had the fire alarm go off once. And so we talk about like, well, what's the worst thing that could happen?

Like what are you actually afraid of? And imagine that it did. What would you do about it? Because like you're saying, just being prepared and knowing that you could be agile and handle it is like really helpful when it comes to calm confidence and. Of course you wanna imagine the best case scenario, but sometimes imagining the worst is really helpful as well.

Going back to your, what did you call it, your reputation? Bank account. Bank account, yeah. I love that. Yes. So what do you, what is your personal opinion on cancel [00:10:00] culture? Do you think that it is like, um, we should continue to give people like the benefit of the doubt if they made one wrong. Or like tone deaf video.

Do you like what's I have, I have a complicated relationship with cancel culture. Um, because in my case, let's just say I did something that I didn't mean, or maybe I did need to learn a lesson and, uh, people got upset about it. I would hope that I could take from my reputation bank account and say.

Educate me, I'm so sorry. Mm-hmm. Uh, won't happen again. But then sometimes I see other people that like post something or share something and I'm like, come on. Like in what world did you think that this was okay? And it makes me really not wanna follow them. Mm-hmm. Even this brand that I follow recently, I won't say the name, but they did, um.

It's this brand of sunglasses that I love. They're small business, like, been supporting them for years. [00:11:00] Did a video recently that was like a parody on, um, things that, like asking questions, um, in the office to their employees that mm-hmm. Uh, they knew like women wouldn't know. So. Sports related and all these things, and it was just really like, what was the need to do that?

Of course, I wanna assume good intent and think it's just like maybe an intern that got a, you know, had a tough first start, but it also makes me not wanna shop there anymore. Mm-hmm. Um, and so what is your take on cancel culture? Have we gone too far or is this really course correcting that we need? 

Caitlin Gardner: So I, I, I do think that it is a polarizing time and that people like to be divisive and to find a side or to take a stance.

But I think as brands, it is important to think about what are the pillars that we will always stand behind? What are the things that do matter to us? And that could evolve as leadership changes happen or as brands evolve or as. [00:12:00] Terminology and sensitivities evolve. So I definitely think that having clarity from the top, so that way when there is a tense moment or we're like, okay, are we pulling the video or not?

It's not a delayed response. It's a very quick matrix to say, does this match what we stand for? So in that case, you know, is it a playful thing? Were they, were, they were, were they. You know, trying to engage the audience. Sometimes it is appropriate to be provocative in a consumer driven con, you know, consumer way.

So I think it, you know, it's a case by case basis for that. I, I have to give a shout out to Taylor Swift. She just did a whole song about cancel culture and how yes, she really reveres like, it's okay to be provocative and be a little bit edgy and all of that, you know? So I think that there's, she also pokes fun intentionally, really strategically, and I love.

Clever lines and lyrics, and she's an artist in that sense, and a masterful one to be able to say like, yeah, I liked my friends canceled, I think is the language there showing that it [00:13:00] happens. You know, we're in this environment so we can still support each other that way. I think it's less about how you showed up in that one moment and how you showed up for your reputation bank account.

So you're taking and you're building that up, and then also what are you doing in the future? Mm-hmm. Not only are you showing up in that one moment, but what are you doing next time? How are you showing up? Are you evolving? Is it changing? Or are you saying, yeah, that is what we meant to say. You're doubling down.

So I think it does matter on a case by case basis, knowing that you're not gonna satisfy everyone but. The vast majority are who you are trying to target to do your values align. Um, and that, that is hard in today's world. I think it's always been hard. I think it's just faster and more in your face with how we're communicating.

But there's always been, you know, different opinions on things. So how do we find the right way to respectfully communicate, um, and share ideas, um, no matter what your views could be. 

Jess Ekstrom: I think the way that social media is framed these days doesn't leave room [00:14:00] for nuance because you as a creator, want the hook and you want to show that you have certainty around something.

And so it's like, stop, you know? I'll give an example, like, uh, you know, our social media, we had a. Post, uh, it didn't go out, but when I saw it I was like, um, oh, I don't like the way that this is framed. Um, it was something around like, you know, stop doing this and start doing this. And it was like, I just don't know if we need to be that.

Aggressive in our communication. Like if someone wants to do that, do that. But I understand what our social media person was doing because she's like, I'm trying to get their attention because how else are we supposed to? And so in this world of like hooks and like, listen to this and don't believe that.

It's so hard to do it and leave room for nuance. 

Caitlin Gardner: And I think that falls into your value proposition, [00:15:00] that you wanna be authentic. You wanna be encouraging to different styles, inclusive. You wanna be encouraging to women who are hoping to find their voice, tell their story. So that matches what you said.

But there's different ways to tell your story, and maybe there is somebody who's doing that thing that we said not to do, and it's masterful and it's working well for them. So I. Think why communications matters and why communications, intentional communications, especially for growth-minded companies who are looking to, you know, expand or to grow.

Maybe they have one location, they want to get bigger. There's no way that one person can operationalize and do all of that on their own. They need their team, so they need to find. Team members, like you have to say, okay, here's the framework we're working with, here's the filters. We wanna think through and justify that.

That's why a strategy document, something that may say, what is the strategic goal of that post? You know, is it to drive engagement? Is it to be provocative? And if it is, great, let's be very clear that that was designed to do that [00:16:00] and there could be an appropriate time for that type of language. Um, so I think just as long as we can justify the.

Rationale and, and, and be intentional about it. That's great. I have a client who's like, oh yeah, we went viral and a few times and it drove sales and it was so organic. And what we wanna do is we, we love those moments, of course, but it actually creates other trickle down issues because maybe they weren't able to take inventory, the website crashed, they didn't have enough on the shelf.

So instead, let's create and be intentional about these waves in these moments. Let's make sure we know. Which influencers we want to work with intentionally. So it doesn't mean that we don't wanna go viral and have organic coverage, but we do wanna make sure that we're very clear so that way we can meet the goals and we can maintain what growth looks like.

So that way they have a good customer experience too, because as soon as you go viral and then no one's responding to the comments, or people aren't able to fulfill orders. That's gonna be a negative [00:17:00] thing too. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. So from a business perspective and brand perspective, we wanna make sure that we're trying to be as intentional as possible.

Jess Ekstrom: Do you think, and this might, you might have just answered my question with intentionality, but do you think that brands, including people, because obviously at Mic Drop we work with people who are brands. That's right. Do you think like it's, how do I wanna say this? Um, getting involved in. Like having a point of view about what's happening in the world or being involved.

Like even a few years ago when Johnny Depp and Amber heard mm-hmm. Were, you know, in trial, like, yeah. The company that I first started wanted to create a post around it because it's what was going viral. Mm-hmm. Even though we had nothing to do with it, I was like, I just don't really feel good about inserting ourself in this conversation just for the sake of exposure when it has nothing to do with us.

Um, but I also see [00:18:00] brands like Ben and Jerry's, you know, that are like, uh, even though, you know, Jerry just stepped down, but that have like made it a point and a part of their brand to be involved and have a point of view around things. What is your take on that? Because it's something I grapple with I think almost every day with every headline.

Caitlin Gardner: Yeah, I mean, I think everybody has different passion, passion projects, so if you find one that aligns with you, and if that could be a nonprofit, a political organization, even a mantra or a mission that you're focused on, I think if it matches who you are and you can add depth to it, I think that works.

Mm-hmm. Now, the one that you mentioned of like, oh, something went viral and we wanted to be trendy and everything like that, that probably, I agree with your analysis that that probably didn't feel right to who you were. Yeah. What's the thing, not only in that moment, but what's the thing are you doing after that?

Like, how are you building on that? Mm-hmm. Um, other ones, you know, I work in the food and retail industry a lot. Sometimes there's a lot of food trends or recipe trends. Well, that makes sense for those types of brands to insert themselves there. Right, right. Um, you know, right [00:19:00] now if there's a showmanship or a theatrical thing that you might wanna comment on that makes sense.

The movie Wicked is coming out and I'm a PR girl and there's. So many PR stories in the Wicked Story, it's about perception. Yeah. It's about ba who's a good witch and then she turns and the public perception is that she's the wicked witch. Mm. If that's not the power of public relations, I don't know what is.

So I'm gonna be doing some content around that story 'cause it's something meaningful to me. So as long as we can justify it. So I literally will challenge my team to say, what is the strategic rationale? What was the creative spark that led you to do it? And if they say, oh, it was viral, so I just wanted to hop on the bandwagon, that could be a reason.

But if you could say, it matches our brand in these three ways, now you've got something to think about and you as the decision maker, as the face of it, you get to have the opportunity to say yay or nay. Then the team should come with so many ideas that get you thinking. Mm-hmm. I would rather have. 15 ideas and only one ends up [00:20:00] being public.

But that's the creative process. So I think it's okay to push back, but I would challenge a team everywhere. If it's yourself, if it's a partner like Chat, GPT, or an AI tool. Mm-hmm. How are you making sure that this matches the brand essence? So that takes a lot of work. And you can evolve it too. You might be like, well, that's where we were five years ago when we started out, but today we're different or today we're more narrow.

Um hmm. You know, personally, I end up working with a lot of female brands or a lot of female marketing people. Um, and I mentor a lot of students and PR and communications, and that's authentic to me. My formula for success is helping other people, so sometimes that fills up my reputation bank account, but usually it's also filling up my heart.

Yeah, and that's, that's true to me. 

Jess Ekstrom: I love that the reputation bank account is like one of my biggest takeaways from this. Mm-hmm. How can you leave just with a couple like parting word to the wise for someone who is either getting negative energy, [00:21:00] you know, online or just like their website crashed or just these like high stakes and high stakes is relative.

Mm-hmm. But like, it's something that feels. High stakes to them. Maybe what are like two to three things they can pause and think about before they take their next step. 

Caitlin Gardner: So first is if you don't have all the answers, that's okay. Find the right team. Be resourceful. Find a PR person. Find a communications coach.

Find somebody who can help you find fellow entrepreneurs. I love your club because you're meeting with other Mike. Experienced people and people who want to grow professionally. So find a tribe that can help you bounce ideas. I call this my personal board of advisors as well. So they, they I talk to all the time and I, I think that's important.

So be resourceful. Find a group that works for you. The other thing I say often is you don't get to choose when the stakes are high, but you do choose how you communicate. So maybe you're giving somebody on your team feedback and that was a throwaway moment for you. 'cause you're like, oh, I owed them some feedback.

That was great. [00:22:00] But for them, that was a high stakes moment. They had, they, they were, you know, opining on it. They, they're thinking about they're overanalyzing that moment. So recognize that you're not only having high stakes moment yourself, you're also delivering high stakes moments. Um, yes. And it might not be for you, but for them, that might have been a very pivotal lesson.

Thank you. So look for those because how you show up when you're giving high stakes feedback sometimes is, is also good lessons in there. 

Jess Ekstrom: Oh my gosh, I, it's such a good point. Sometimes I forget that I'm the boss and I just shoot an email if someone's like, Hey, can you meet on Thursday at 9:00 AM And they're like, and I'm like, oh, I literally just wanted to go over our, you know, this.

And I just forget sometimes. Yeah. And so it's so good to have that reminder. Uh, Caitlin Gardner, thank you so much. Where can people find you, work with you, book you to speak? Tell us, yes, 

Caitlin Gardner: I am speaking about high stakes communications all over the world, and the best way to find me is on LinkedIn at Caitlin Gardner [00:23:00] and also on blooming com.com.

Awesome. Thanks Caitlin.

Jess Ekstrom: Thanks for listening to Amplify. If you're a fan of the show, show us some podcast love by giving us a rating and review. This episode is brought to you by Mic Drop Workshop, where you can learn how to become a better speaker. How to land paid speaking gig. And become a keynote speaker. This episode was edited and produced by Walk West.

I'm Jess Tro reminding you that you deserve the biggest stage, so let's find out how to get you there. I'll see you again soon.