Unlock Your Peak Performance

Molly Fletcher

Molly Fletcher is a trailblazing former sports agent who spent nearly two decades negotiating contracts for the world’s top athletes and coaches, earning her the nickname “the female Jerry Maguire.” Today, she’s a keynote speaker, author of The Energy Clock and Dynamic Drive, and host of Game Changers with Molly Fletcher. Known for her powerhouse presence on stage, Molly speaks globally on peak performance, leadership, and building confidence through action.

Books by Molly Fletcher:

SHOW NOTES

Jess Ekstrom talks with keynote speaker, author, and former top sports agent Molly Fletcher about how confidence is built through action—not perfection. Molly shares her journey from teaching tennis for rent to representing some of the biggest names in sports, and how that experience now shapes the way she shows up on stage.

Together, Jess and Molly cover:

• Why confidence comes after the reps, not before
• How to practice negotiation in low-stakes situations
• Tips for asking for what you deserve—at work, on stage, or in everyday life
• Why protecting your energy is more important than achieving balance
• The power of knowing your “why” and using it to stay motivated
• Her Alignment Audit framework for realignment and purpose
• Why being yourself is the most powerful strategy for connecting with an audience

Resources & Links Mentioned:

Molly’s Website

Mic Drop Workshop 

Game Changers Podcast

TED Talk

TRANSCRIPT

Molly: [00:00:00]

We can choose to, to opt into a narrative that isn’t gonna serve us, or we can choose to opt into a narrative that will, and, and it doesn’t mean that, that we won’t have those moments of self-doubt. I’ve had a thousand of ’em all the time. And what I know too is that so have the athletes and coaches that the world looks at and goes.

You. There’s no way Steph Curry gets nervous a hundred percent. They do a hundred percent, but they do it anyway.

Jess: Welcome to Amplify with Jess Ekstrom. If you’re ready to amplify your ideas, your influence, and your income, then you’re in the right place. Today’s guest is the Molly Fletcher, a former trailblazing sports agent known as the female Jerry McGuire, and now one of the most in demand motivational speakers in the world.

Molly shares why confidence isn’t something you wait for, it’s something you build

[00:01:00]

through action, whether you’re negotiating a raise, asking for what you deserve, or stepping on stage for the first or hundredth time. She offers real actionable advice on how to show up, speak up, and level up without burning out.

But first, let’s start with one of my favorite stories. After playing tennis at Michigan State, 21-year-old, Molly moved from Michigan to Atlanta and figured out how to live rent free for nine years.

Molly: I essentially got, when I got down, I had learned through a few phone calls and I’m a big fan of curiosity, which I talk about a lot too, that, that you could teach tennis at apartment complex in, in exchange for a little reduction on your rent.

And when I learned that, I was like, wait a minute. I played tennis at Michigan State Taught, I thought this, this is exactly what I need to try to make it down here. ’cause I didn’t have any money or a job. So long story short, I negotiated with this apartment manager pretty close to where I

[00:02:00]

was at my friends and, and negotiated a deal to teach tennis in exchange for my rent one night a week.

So I had sort of all day to continue to pursue and I just taught every Tuesday night for an hour and a half and. You know, really just anchored it. And I, I brought gear from Wilson Sporting Goods that I got my buddy to hook me up with so that I could give it away at the clinics. I went across the street to this pizza place and got them to, you know, agree to gimme free pizza once a month in exchange for me putting coupons in the newsletter for ’em, and wrote tennis tips for the newsletter.

And so I’m a big fan of, you know, how do you, sometimes I say like, act like you have the business before you have the business and mm-hmm. So they, they offered 500 bucks off the 850, which was the monthly number, and I sort of tried to continue to add value until she sort of looked at me after a couple days and said, you know what, like the guy we have doesn’t do any of this stuff.

Like this is incredible. Like the pizza, the tips, the Wilson stuff. And so I moved in and taught

[00:03:00]

literally every Tuesday night for free for nine years. It was killer. It was a it, you know, and, and it was really a little bit of a, uh, unsophisticated version of how I recruited athletes too. Uh, at some level I was gonna say.

Jess: What were, you know, because I think about that sometimes too, is like, I’m sure at this point in your career, whether you were doing, you know, a deal with an athlete or a deal for a speaking engagement. ’cause you’re one of the most top booked speakers in the world. You have learned the art of making things a win-win.

And maybe people call that negotiation, I don’t know. Maybe not. Mm-hmm. But what is some word to the whys for the people who are listening, um, that want to learn how to negotiate better? Mm-hmm. Or want to demand a, a higher fee for their speaking. Or maybe just ask their boss, you know, for a promotion. What are some tips that you have around [00:04:00] negotiation?

Molly: Yeah. And, and it was my world for almost 20 years in that space, but. You know, for, for me, I think we, we get more confident, influencing, asking for what we want, as you said, what you know, having difficult conversations, which is sort of what negotiation is when we practice. So what I first encourage people always to do is practice in a really safe environment.

I. Practice when you go to Starbucks and you, and you want an extra shot and you need to, you know, go roll over to the barista and sort of work ’em a little bit and see if he’ll throw an extra shot in. I mean, and I’m just sort of using that as a fun, but just practice in safe environments. I negotiated with an orthodontist for our daughters, you know, braces once or so.

So practice negotiating and that was something truly, I, I would watch my mom growing up, you know, talk the. Checkout counter lady at the grocery store into taking an expired coupon or working the lady behind the Nordstrom desk to try to see if she’d give her just a little bit more off because of the, you know, spot on the dress that she wanted.

And

[00:05:00]

so I, I realized that the more that we practice, the more comfortable we get when we’re in bigger moments. And you know, for me, I, I certainly didn’t negotiate a hundred million dollar contracts out of the shoot for big league baseball players. You know, I mean, I started. You know, doing, you know, dry cleaning, trade out for an NBA coach or free water bottles for a baseball player.

And the more that you practice, the more comfortable and confident you get. So, number one, get reps in in a safe environment. It’ll help you feel more comfortable. And then I think little things like, you know, I think one of the mistakes we make sometimes is we spend a lot of time thinking about what we want and need and, and the problem that we’re potentially working to solve for ourselves.

And I think we’re much better suited. I. Spending time in the head and the heart of the other people that we’re trying to do a deal with so that we can uncover what is their gap and how can I support closing it for them. It’s like that apartment complex story. It’s not like she’s waking up every day losing, you know, grinding, trying to find the perfect [00:06:00] tennis bro, right?

Like she just wants to keep her occupancy up and her residents happy and renewals going and, and if I could be a part of solving that for her, that was what mattered. To her the most. So I think that is a critical component that often we overlook and can serve us all well in, in supporting and serving other people when we’re trying to, trying to get a deal done.

Getting the reps

Jess: in is so important. We just started something called Mic Drop Club. We actually have a chapter in Atlanta, so would love for you to make it. Oh, cool. Yeah. Uh, a cameo there where it is a women’s speaking club to just get the reps in because Cool. Most of the time when you. Are doing the deal or the negotiation or the speaking opportunity.

The time you get to practice is the time that you’re doing it, you know? Yeah. Where you’re live on air or whatever it is. And it’s funny, like talking about just doing it in low stakes environments. I mean, like you, I have negotiated a speaker fee with some of the biggest companies in the world, but

[00:07:00]

yesterday my hands are quivering at Publix.

Trying to get a refund for these ex expired cookies with this like 15-year-old kid behind the counter that’s like, yeah, lady, just go get another set of cookies. And so it’s so funny how like no matter how many times, sometimes I do this in like some areas of my life, I still am a people pleaser in other areas.

Yeah. Was that ever something, I mean, you’re a woman in, in such a male dominated field. Yeah. Yeah. Obviously dubbed female Jerry McGuire. Talk about imposter syndrome or did you ever feel like I not only have to be as good as the men in my industry, I have to be better in order to get the same amount of respect?

Molly: Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And I, and I think too, it’s important to delineate between negotiating for someone else and negotiating for ourselves. And I think that’s an important thing to consider because. We, we often have a harder time asking for

[00:08:00]

things for ourselves. So true. But like when my girls were young, I mean, I’d roll into the elementary school and get it done for them.

Do you know what I mean? Like every mom or, or, or was listening. Absolutely. So I, I think we have to delineate between that and we have to sort of pull back and say, what’s at risk? If I do ask for what I want, what I deserve, what, what is right, if you will, what is fair and what is at risk if I don’t? And so, I mean, to your question about being, you know, looking at the outside and then adjusting what I do on the inside, and that’s a lot of what I talk about in Dynamic Drive is this different approach to drive this different approach to the pursuit, which is this desire to be better from the inside out.

And, and I, I certainly found myself in moments where I was mistaken as a girlfriend or why are you somebody, why is your wife walking a, a practice round with you to a PGH tour player? And there was a lot of moments where I’d curl back up and crawl in my car

[00:09:00]

and think. Maybe I’m crazy. Mm-hmm. Like there are no, there’s no women out here.

Like managers are yelling at players for talking to me through the fence at ballparks. What am I doing right? Maybe this is crazy. But then I started to go, wait a minute. Or I could tell myself a different story that could in fact, close a gap in the market and serve these athletes and coaches better than maybe.

The people that have been doing it for a long time or differently. And, and so I think we, we can, we can choose to, to opt into a narrative that isn’t gonna serve us, or we can choose to opt into a narrative that will, and, and it doesn’t mean that, that we won’t have those moments of self-doubt. I’ve had a thousand of ’em all the time.

And what I know too is that so have the athletes and coaches that the world looks at and goes. You, there’s no way Steph Curry gets nervous. There is no way, you know, Jalen Herz is, you know, a little bit anxious or, or has

[00:10:00]

self-doubt in moments. A hundred percent. They do a hundred percent, but they do it anyway.

I. And that’s the, the, the, the how we build our confidence by doing it. To your point about, I love the club in Atlanta or, and, and otherwise that the more that you sort of practice, the more comfortable that you get when you step into that, the, the different and maybe bigger moments. I.

Jess: You shared that studies show 80% of people give up on their New Year’s resolutions by February.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. So even sometimes when we’re trying to have, you know, be better or do better mm-hmm. It fades quickly. Uh, why, why is that?

Molly: What can we do about it? Well, it, I mean, well, what we can do about it, I think is a few things. I mean, number one is recognizing that motivation, like the motivation that somebody feels when they set their New Year’s resolutions or set a goal is it’s there like they’re well intended goals or, or, or outcomes that we want, but, but motivation isn’t enough, you know?

Mm-hmm. It, it, it isn’t enough. I mean, it’s

[00:11:00]

a wonderful thing, but it isn’t enough to keep you going, and so you need. Lots of other things in service of being able to keep going and, and, and, and I, you know, there’s seven keys that I think are critical that I talk about, dynamic drive, but, but one I think that is really critical is the why around it.

Jess. I mean, I think we have to know why, and so purpose is such a critical component for continuing the work when it gets hard. Which it, it, anything that’s sort of interesting and worthwhile in our lives, I believe are gonna be hard and they’re gonna require discipline and resilience and other people’s support and all a lot of things.

And so we’ve gotta know why. Beyond just that. We wrote it down on December 30th and said, we’re gonna do something. Right. Right. You know, it it, and, and so, and that’s why I, I love this piece that I, that has helped a lot of people, and I’ll share it briefly, but it’s something I call an alignment audit, which, [00:12:00] which is a really important way, I think, to get aligned with what we’re chasing in life, I think sometimes.

Mm-hmm. When you ask people, what are you chasing? They’re not sure, but they’re really busy and I found myself there, right? Like, it’s like, what are you, what are you chasing? And so I think you can pull back and say, what are the things that are most important to you? Right? Like, what are those things, you know, physically, mentally, emotionally, relationally?

What are those things? And then consider, okay, how much time, attention, and energy am I giving those things that are, that I’ve identified as being really, really important to me. And then rate yourself, right? So like you’ve identified these things that are, let’s call it a 10 in your life. They’re tens, they’re really important to you.

Then you’ve rated yourself relative to the amount of time, attention, focus, energy, you’re giving it like a five. Like I say, sleep’s important to me. It’s a 10, but I’m not really treating it like it’s critical, [00:13:00] so I’ve got a gap. So it just exposes the areas that are opportunities for improvement. Yes. I love So, I think, so.

I think one is, you know, what, what is, what is the real why around it? ’cause it keeps you going when it gets hard. I, if you are trying to lose weight and it’s a New Year’s resolution and the why is, I would argue something that is external and in sort of superficial in nature versus maybe I wanna lose weight because I wanna be able to get on the floor.

With my children and play with them. So they remember that I was right down there with ’em, putting those Legos together, and I can’t get down there anymore and feel comfortable. That’s a why that’s gonna keep you walking past the chocolate chip cookies on the counter. You know what I mean? Right. So purpose is critical.

And, and then I think we gotta break ’em down into little steps. You know, one big audacious goal. We, we’ve gotta break ’em down into, into little steps. Along the way and recognize the power and acknowledging our effort along the way. I

[00:14:00]

call ’em dopamine hits. We have this incredible chemical in our body called dopamine, and we can tap into it by acknowledging our progress along the way and sort of releasing a little bit of that, do dopamine.

And so it’s important along the way to say. Hey, I’m doing pretty good, man. Like, I’m, I’m taking, I’m tracking here. That’s a really important thing. And celebrate along the way when little things sort of, you have some, some success. Celebrate ’em, acknowledge it, and celebrate it. So I think those are some things that can help people that are maybe finding themselves right now going.

Oh, I mean, I’m not tracking and yeah. You know, those things can help.

Jess: And you talk also about, I think this is really important for women protecting your energy. It is something that I feel like, you know, on a scale of one to 10 right now I’m at like a, a two on that because I also have two kids under two right now.

Uh, a eight month old and a. A 2-year-old. And so protecting my energy, there’s things that I,

[00:15:00]

I, of course, want to do. Sure. Um, but I always feel like, uh, I think I haven’t turned off. I. The boundary like setting. Yeah. I want to be able to say yes and I wanna be able to make people happy, even if it’s at the expense of my energy.

And so do you have tips around protecting your energy so you can say yes to the things that you really wanna say yes to?

Molly: Oh my gosh. I mean, do we, can we go for another hour, Jess? Because like, this is a hot button for me. I know, I know. I, I mean, my husband and I had three kids in 12 months and I was running around like a maniac as an agent and all this things.

I knew you would be the person to talk to about this. And, and that was, you know, I remember like, I think I got on an airplane and I’d flown all over and, and I was crying. I was exhausted. So all of this to say I was chasing, I think the wrong formula and what I think the world. Says is you can, Hey

[00:16:00]

Jess.

You can balance it all like you can balance the kids, the husband, the work, the, the health, the we. You can balance it, but I think that that’s the wrong. Pursuit. I think balance is a nebulous, unattainable, exhausting attempt that isn’t achievable. And I don’t even think it’s actually what we want. I know.

Yeah. It’s a guilt trap. It’s brutal. Mm-hmm. And so, ’cause I was doing that, I was chasing this balance thing and then I was like, wait a minute, this is not working. And I feel worse. Like I feel like I you and you feel worse about yourself because you’re like trying to pour into all these things that you’re balancing.

But what’s happening is you’re, you’re actually not laddering up and aligning with what matters. So I think the better question is. What are the things that really matter most? And then creating the, the processes and the discipline to say yes and no against the things that matter most to you. And this is a little bit

[00:17:00]

of a byproduct of the alignment audit.

What are the, what are, what are, what are, then you gonna say yes and no to, which becomes really clear because you’ve identified what matters most. Mm-hmm. The result of that is living in alignment with what matters. Most of you. And the truth is, I think to go after things in our lives wholeheartedly, we’re gonna be out of balance.

Mm-hmm. There’s gonna be periods of time where we’re out of balance, and then there’s gonna be periods of time where, where, where we’re not. That’s why I think balance is the wrong pursuit. So I think. I what? What I’m fundamentally encourage people to do is, is one, get really clear on what matters most, because I think that will allow you to play a different game that is a game that is unattainable game and one that is possible, and one that actually ensures that you’re living into the legacy you wanna leave versus.

Trying to sort of,

[00:18:00]

you know, show up as 50% of yourself in thousands of categories, you know? Mm-hmm. Yeah. So I think that that’s a powerful thing. But the other thing I think is critical is like when I was an agent, athletes, all they do is think about who and what they give their energy to. I always joke when I’m keynoting at events and I’ll say like, does anybody ever show up for like a Zoom meeting and go.

Why am I in this meeting? Like what am I doing here? And everybody laughs ’cause they’re like, totally. And then you get to the four o’clock meeting on Wednesday, that’s critical. Hugest pitch in the of the week, big client, whatever it might be. And you don’t have any energy. For the one that really mattered.

So I, I think we have to get really, really clear on, on, on looking at our lives through the lens of energy and our schedules through the lens of energy. ’cause we live as business people through the world of time, but I actually think we’ve gotta steal something from the world of sports and think

[00:19:00]

about it through the lens of energy.

So I would say protect the things in your, that give you energy in your calendar. Like your life depends on it. Mm. The fleet,

Jess: the workouts, the whatever it is. And being able to articulate that too to others, you know, and being able to have an unapologetic, oh, I can’t make that. Uh mm-hmm. You know what, and, and no being a complete answer.

We have a lot of women speakers who listen to this podcast.

Molly: Mm-hmm.

Jess: You’re one of the most top booked speakers in the world. Your TED Talk has over a million views. What advice do you have for women? Uh, trying to either make it out there as a professional speaker or just be able to speak

Molly: with confidence.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, I, I think it, it’s, it’s doing it often, as often as you can. I mean, and, you know, stepping in to the, to the little moments in getting the reps and, and recognizing that, I mean, you’re [00:20:00] kind to say all those things, but the truth is like. For, you know, you know, years ago my husband and I were standing, you know, stealing a ballroom at the Ritz Carlton with a camera on.

I was changing my clothes 17th times so we could make a speaker rail. I mean, you know what I mean? Like, we’ve all been, we’ve all been there. Totally. So I would just say to people. You know, say yes, yes, yes. Get the reps in. ’cause I always think the more you speak, the more you speak and the more comfortable that you get, the more that you begin to learn what lands and what doesn’t.

When people laugh, when they don’t, what people seem to connect to more than they don’t connect to. And so I think that is just a really, really critical component to to, to feeling. Like you can say yes to maybe a bigger moment that is something that, in fact, you wanna do. Obviously, it’s a little bit of a different model if, if you’re wanting to sort of speak and, and present inside of your organization versus potentially speak.

Speak. And then I, I think asking for feedback from people that you know

[00:21:00]

are gonna tell you the truth. Because what happens after a keynote is everybody’s like, oh my God, that was a man. You’re the best. Yeah. Whatever. Yeah. And so like I believe nothing and I always wanna sort of get to the person that’s gonna go like, but did that link like or have people, whether it’s my husband or my team in the room that go and like.

By the way, like when you told that story, like you missed this and that would’ve been helpful. And that like get people that are gonna give you really authentic feedback so that you can keep getting better and better and better and, and in service really of connecting with the audience, which is obviously a hundred percent of, of the reason that we’re there.

Um, so those were a couple things that come up for me, but I could. You know, I can go on and on on that one. Jess. I think

Jess: the themes around what you talk about with dynamic Drive, with being a sports agent and being a speaker are know your why. Yeah. Get in the reps and get your confidence through action.

And I think no matter what we’re tackling this

[00:22:00]

week or next week, if we can focus on those three things. We can do some work.

Molly: Well, yeah, and I think too, Jess, you know the other thing that comes up for me is it be, be you. Be you. Mm-hmm. Right? Like when I was an agent, I didn’t try to be like the guys in the khakis and the golf shirts.

And when I thought about it, I mean, that’s not. Who I was, it wasn’t gonna work. And it’s not sustainable. So like you might go and see a speaker and think, oh, I’m gonna try to do that. Mm-hmm. Be yourself. That’s what people connect to and that’s what they want is your version of your take. Whether it’s your stories, your approach, your style, your inflection, your cadence.

Be you. Yes. That’s what is gonna take you home, and, and, and, and, and, and serve others.

Jess: The Molly Fletchers, the Jess TROs, the Glennon Doyles, all of those people already exist, and so people need what, what you have.

Molly: Yeah.

Jess: Molly, thank you so much for being here. I am honored to call you a [00:23:00] friend after all these years and uh, really, really appreciate you coming on Amplify.

Molly: Love it, and it’s awesome to be with you, Jess. Great to see you. Bye everyone.

Jess: Thanks for listening to Amplify. If you’re a fan of the show, show us some podcast love by giving us a rating and review. This episode is brought to you by Mic Drop Workshop, where you can learn how to become a better speaker, how to land paid speaking gigs, and become a keynote speaker. This episode was edited and produced by Walk West.

I’m Jess Ekstrom reminding you that you deserve the biggest. Stage. So let’s find out how to get you there. I’ll see you again soon.